It's Just Not Fair.

I tried to do my bit. It was, after all, a 23rd consecutive day of a grueling 90-minutes, 40 degree Bikram Hot Yoga (I’m on the 30-day challenge).

As fatigued and exhausted as I could, was I, to level the playing field. It was arranged for David M to play with White. John "Dan" Wayne was told to give it up; just enjoy the skate. MacDonald was smart enough to feign an elbow injury and avoid the battle.

After a 12-5 W last Tuesday, the outcome last night was foregone.

And yet, what was I supposed to do?

Last night's hockey game at Save on Foods Memorial Center was a joke; a mismatch of epic proportions, boys against men, another 12-5 debacle.

Someone should retire.

Far be it for me to exaggerate or steep to trash hyperbole. As a trained lawyer and commissioner of oaths, nothing but the truth comes from these lips. There's no vanity here. Truth: I waved at one of Classen’s pussy wrist shots; my D should tied Kope up, who scored on a pass from the corner; and Merner was offside on an allowed wraparound goal.

But the saves.

The saves.

The sheer number of heart and puck-stopping, lightning quick – nay – as quick as light itself – leather bits and pieces thwarting the black rubber disc. All must've seemed but a blur to White, frustrated as they increasingly became.

I heard: "That can't be Duhaime! Duhaime sucks!"

Thus, emotions took over, the sticks rose with the stakes as fate teased White with a short-lived 7-6 score.

“Go White,” came a low, insincere whisper from the benches.

And then, sudden death.

Bang! Bang! Bang! Again and again, Red struck as White tried to no avail to put anything past the player wearing #1; defenseman pinched, Merner broke the rules; Savard – Kope – Buckley – Classen – MacGregor each picked out the revolver and shot from point-blank range only to be denied, although Connell squeaked one in on a breakaway.

But in all of that, the words of an objective observer ought to conclude this account. Bentham the wise, himself, entered the locker room and had but one word to describe the difference.

Goaltending.

It was sick, the carnage horrible, the mass depression in the far locker room palpable from one end of the modern arena to the other. Awkward talk spewed from the mouths of a defeated White as if at a wake, as they quietly plotted their revenge on February 9th. But that would be a mere five days before the start of the 2010 Olympic games. Left off the Team Canada squad, greater motivation this oldtimer French Canadian ice hockey goaltender could not find.

Words of wisdom to White: stay home.

But I Get Up Again

No clue was all that could be found on the Oak Bay Rec Centre ice last night for poor Team Red (WHA).

Captained by Harry Kope and with MacGrrrregor on D, there was nuthin' doin' for 'em.

Team Blue signed Duhaime to his first game as a forward and sparks flew. Duhaime literally lifted mediocre Nyren and Merner to greatness, picking up seventeen assists in the process. Objectively and no exageration: Kope tried to knock the speedy decathlete down and even the passive Connell and Wallace tried to hook and grab but by then, the puck was gone sideways to the tape of either wing-mate.

The carnage was so great that the Red goalie gave up and ex-goalie R. Pym was seen leaving in tears, alleging an upper body injury.

The ultimate compliment occurred when the Russian Mark Taylor asked Duhaime to play on his line next week. Can't buy that kind of a compliment.

Obituary

Lloyd Duhaime, GOALIE, 1999-2009.

Suddenly on December 29, at Save On Foods Arena, Victoria, British Columbia between approximately 9 and 10:15 PM, the Lord called home to Himself, the goaltending skills and abilities of Lloyd Duhaime.

Beloved Quebec-trained goaltender, Lloyd leaves behind fellow oldtimer goalies Nelson and Marcel and will be missed by all especially Edward MacDonald with whom he has played 1,000 hockey games in the past decade.

The palm bearers were selected by lottery and include Eddie, Nelson, Harry, Dan, Michael, Garry, Chuck and Rick Nyren.

As an ice hockey goaltender, Lloyd Duhaime will be remembered for being the goaltender at the Guinness Book of World Record Hockey Game played in 2002 in which he was the only goaltender to record a point and receive a penalty. Starting as a goaltender with the Rhinos Hockey Club at Panorama Arena in Sidney from 1999 to 2004, he moved on to play for the Wilson Hockey Association at Oak Bay Rec Centre.

He then joined the Breakers Hockey Club first at the Memorial Arena, then Esquimalt Arena, then the new Save On Foods Memorial Arena. He is a multiple player-of-the-game winner at the Sooke Oldtimers Hockey Tournament and the Wallace & Sons Annual Hockey Game. He has suited up for Victoria Doctors and with the Oak Bay Noon Hour Duffer hockey. He also organized an annual Duhaime Cup.

Donations in cash or cheque can be made payable to Lloyd Duhaime in generous amounts since, in any event, he can’t cash them.

Duhaime Cup Stays Home!

By Clive Shamshawk

Warning: the veracity of this article has been challenged. Please click here for our challenge policy.

(Victoria) Before a home crowd of 25 and several Salmon Kings who had to defer to this critical old-timers ice hockey game before their pre-Alaska Aces tilt, the 2009 Duhaime Cup remained with Team Duhaime.

In ten games, the cup has been won by Team Duhaime on 7 occasions, with two ties and a single loss, an unprecedented record.

If there was a day for reckoning for Team Simmons, the Las Vegas money would of been on December 26, 2009, what with the entire Merner clan in attendance - including the matriarch - to cheer on their warrior. Ever dangerous, Oxford darted in and out and managed the first two goals for Team Simmons; the first, a push-in from nowhere which caught the goalie off guard; the next a roof job on a zero-angle shot.

But then #66 for Yellow took over and smothered Oxford with hockey love. Bryan's early goal and leadership on defence gave Fast Eddie room to manoeuvre though they took a 2-1 deficit to the locker room at halftime.

Team Simmons' Kope-hope was hurt early on, trying to draw a penalty on a sharp goalie move. The Prussian was alone in the slot on a perfect feed from Fitterer but Duhaime rushed out and the gamble froze Koze ... he chopped and the puck sailed harmlessly up, far above the crossbar. But rather than veer off, likely panicked by the speed of events then unfolding before him, Kopetar chose to dive over the goalie, and crashed into the boards. Words were exchanged even as the ailing forward lay on the ice, all but bleeding, and with wisdom prevailing, no penalty called on the play, and one Team Black man down for the duration of the tilt.

Penalty shots ... Pillows stopped Bryan and Taylor, and Duhaime, Stills. Wallace, Fitterer, Wilson, Taylor and Robinson came in waves and battled but what came to the blue paint, stayed in the blue paint, at both ends as Team Simmons' 29-year old ringer goalie, Pillows, was up to the task.

In the 2nd half, Simmons popped a quick one on a penalty shot to take his squad ahead 3-2 with 10 minutes left on the clock. The peacock feathers were everywhere on the Black bench. Savard was seen skating off the bench, opening and closing his glove towards Duhaime as if to taunt; Savard in game-worn Hamilton Bulldog apparel. In the handshake lineup, only a spirited and unexpected bear hug with Kilgour, and a sucker-punch, stopped a donnybrook.

But these minutes-left situations are why MacDonald exists. Two identical seeing-eye passes to Bert on the other side of the crease shocked and silenced the hockey world as Team Duhaime took the cup. When that final, fourth goal went in, there was but 10 seconds left on the clock ... pandemonium.

In the locker rooms, even Salmon Kings captain Wes Goldie recognized the significance and presumably came to congratulate Team Duhaime, under the guise of returning a forgotten stick (it was Willie's). When Goldie walked away, someone yelled: "If you need a practise goalie, I'm half-dressed!"

To the jealous, the sound that came back may be taken as laughter but to the trained ear, it was a sign of profound good will and respect, hockey man to hockey man; something - and not to overstate this - but something that the Men in Black of Team Simmons may never know.

Already, before even the engine of his Hummer2 had cooled from the long and quiet drive home, the massive frame of Simmons himself was emailing for a grudge match, like a chicken being asked into the slaughter house, like Shackleton asking to return to the South Pole, with the "we'll get you next time" cliché sounding like a Tiger Woods marriage vow.

Pain ... it's all pain for his 11 angry men, and for as long as it takes to rub the egg yolk off their very souls yet elsewhere in Victoria, 11 others chant Olay and wipe the beer stains from the inside of the Duhaime Cup, a band of brothers now proudly H1N1, fresh Blistex on their new cold sores, fleeting souvenirs from the rim of a championship silver bowl filled with Lucky Beer.

Saves and Shine, 68 in 09

Team Red rallied from a 8-4 deficit to win 11-9 in a long Breakers game at Save-On-Foods Arena in downtown Victoria.

I played 6 games in October (coming back on October 13th and my left shoulder is certainly not OK but it's OK for hockey), 12 in November and 12 so far in December with 2 to go, assuming no duffer next week. Ha! Like that's going to happen .. not! I'm on the phone right now. Anyway, I had to stop when I hurt my shoulder on May 13th at which time, I had played 38 games; add 30 since October 13 and so far, for a tentative total, 2009, 68 games ... having missed 5 months.

The 2nd last game of the Fall semester (last Breakers game, next Tuesday), goals were pouring in on a weak Duhaime but then, somehow, the Red stemmed the tide. David Merner was a God out there but then, so, too, were Eddie MacDonald and Ricky Nyren for Team White. Warner Stills also played outstanding, as did Nelson, my nemesis goalie.

It may be a bit of an avant gout of the Duhaime Cup on Saturday. Will Duhaime flounder? Will Simmons keep up the torrid pace? Will Merner and Kope perform as well together? Will Savard have the spirit to play against his fellow quebecois? Will Fast Eddie be the game-breaker he so often is?

But call it what you want - beer league, oldtimers hockey - it's all about the relationships.

None of us are being scouted and at the end of the day, compared to climate change, the final hockey score means little.

The richness of my hockey is in the relationships.

Few, but some, come out to score and win, period, and there's little personal connection before, during and after the game. They are like ghosts in the locker room.

And to their credit, the powers-that-be manage to ferret out those guys and focus on what we really are, a social club of guys that have in common a love for playing ice hockey.

From game to game, we each take our turn to shine and suck but at the end of the day, these are the guys you want at your 50th birthday party.

I am grateful for these buddies and for the time we have together as we trudge from rink to rink playing make-believe important hockey. In 2050, when I'm rocking in some chair at Oak Bay Lodge, I will recall ice hockey and the characters that go by the name Duffer Veterans, Breakers or WHA.

The Boys

Lost 5-4 tonight, Breakers at Save On Foods Memorial Arena in Victoria.

Or was it 6-4?

Anyway, it was a solid hockey game.

Chuck Groot, Dan Savard, Dave Haines and Jimmy Hoskins are playing great hockey this Fall. These are guys who have stepped up their game this Fall. And an honourable mention to Doug Connell and Dick Izard.

All are defying their birth certificates in consistently making good, instant decisions with a 1" puck in a game played on ice. Trust me: when defencemen screw up, I am immediately made aware of it!

All but DI are on my Breakers team this Fall but that'll change after Christmas when we (finally) mix it up a bit.

At the same time, you have your old faithful who always show up: Tommy MacGregor, Mark Taylor, Eddie MacDonald, Ricky Nyren, Nelson Bartel, Hugh Turner and Ron Lindsay.

Our one German player was robbed of a roof job and there was a mild complaint of an offside on Ricky Nyren's last goal of the game but these are just loser excuses.

We did throw a lot of pucks on net tonight and we didn't get the breaks in the slot we could have but you earn your hockey luck.

Two more games with the boys and then it's Christmas but it's back in the blue tomorrow with Victoria doctors Hockey, 1:30 to 3:00 at Oak Bay Rec.

Huge

Dude!

Played against a great 20-something goalie today at Oak Bay duffer (Trevor) and still made it to 1:05PM (started at Noon) in the first game. That alone is huge.

A 10-5 loss but I was delighted with the whole thing. The guy's glove hand was on fire and got me going. What a delight to watch him play - reminds me of Randy C.

He was so dominant that guys were not shooting and doing the extra dangle - the ultimate compliment for a goalie.

It wasn't the usual crew either - no Z etc. - many guys I didn't know which made it fun. Not a single "beginner" either.

Anyway, I didn't know what I was getting into especially as I was playing 12 hours after last night's WHA game but yee-haw!

Love duffer!

Every Little Mistake

I had a great time at hockey tonight which is a weird comment for a goalie who lost and let in nine goals (there was one empty netter; final: 10-9).

I thought I played fine but every little mistake seemed to end in a goal. Willie Fitterer had two awesome goals, both just inside the posts.

It did not help that I got hit for two late goals, both low blocker side - literally, on the ice, which sealed the deal for the enemies, WHA Red. I just watched them sail by as I had a mental committee meeting to decide whether to kneel and kick out the pad or kick out the pad as I kneel. Like there was time ....

It was a 90-minute seesaw battle and we fought back from several two goal deficit to tie it. eventually, it was 8-8 and we even went ahead 9-8.

Other than the simple math of giving up too many goals, it has been an exciting week of tight hockey at both Breakers and WHA.

The weather is very cold; minus 7 tonight, so it is a good time to play ice hockey. Christmas is almost upon us, which means the Duhaime Cup can't be far away (December 26th).

What The Hell

6-6 affairs tonight at SOFA with Ed working hard to be sprung on a breakaway ... about 4 minutes to go and I missed the poke check, completing his hat trick.

Those are bad moments for a goalie as it's do-or-die but you don't attempt the poke check with a 6-5 lead and 4 minutes to go.

Flash also had a weird goal - after I stopped him twice point blank, he corralled la rondelle behind the net and shot it out front from behind the goal line, I suppose (unless it was a planned play?), and it hit a plastic part of my chest protector and popped right in. I made the choice to not duck - betting the puck would hit me, drop and stop their offence - and I paid for it.

His call on the breakaway was a good read but it frustrated an awesome performance by my Red defence, Savard, Lindsay, Chuck and Hainsers.

What the hell: I had a good game but for one dribbler change-up which locked my legs: I was wound up for a real shot and in came this little thing that just trickled through my legs.

That made it 4-3; we still had the lead. Gordie and Don had a tussle, Jim Hoskins played great and Ricky N missed the last half of the game when his blade support broke.

What a comeback for White even with Ricky N benched.

Olay, Olay-Olay-Olay, Olay, Olay

Nice, tidy 8-5 win at WHA ce soir at Oak Bay Rec, on a very cold Victoria day (zero degrees all day).

David Merner and Ricky Nyren was all the offence we needed though the other line with Gord and Chuck worked hard. David scored on a wrap-around in his zillioneth try but he was awesome tonight giving fits to Dick Izard and Gary Kilgour on Red defence.

Ed and Mark Taylor, the latter with Warren Minnie, were flies. At one point, MT had some kind of event in the corner and I was so busy watching that I let Warren shovel it in uncontested. I had to sing the Canadiens Olay, olay-olay-olay, olay, olay song to perfect pitch.

Tom MacGregor was a monster for us and somehow we also had Warner; didn't hurt.

Nelson's out with an undisclosed injury so this was the 2nd one against Marcel.

No Savard or Kope so I didn't have to worry about trash talk though I did suggest to Dr. Doug that he find a knitting group for Thursday nights.

Olay, olay-olay-olay. Olay. Olay.